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journey towards healing
three months have come and gone in a flash. it was just a little over 3 months ago that tracy and i were scrambling to sell our house, packing and selling a lot of our things, and getting everything squared away to move to naperville… just 3 short months! i can’t believe it’s already been three months that i’ve been a part of the CCC team and yet at the same time it feels like i’ve been here forever. this has been a good journey so far, a restorative journey, a healing journey, and an encouraging journey that has spoken volumes to my heart and has begun to piece back together my soul and my passion… and it’s only just beginning! needless to say, i’m really looking forward to the remaining 9 months!
yesterday i had my 90 day review and i have to say i was extremely intimidated and fearful—the only other review that i’ve had in ministry was last december (’06) in which i was reamed, berated and hung out to dry (mainly because i was “binding the Holy Spirit”—whatever that means)… needless to say it wasn’t a good experience. however, yesterday was quite the opposite… yesterday, i received accolades that i never thought possible and my 90-day review went better than I could have ever expected. words of affirmation and compliments flew like crazy and honestly, it was (and still is) hard to take. maybe it’s because i’ve never really heard those sorts of things from a church, elders or peers before and when i have had those things said i haven’t really been able to truly hear them because of the baggage that has always surrounded me.
being in an environment where i am celebrated, encouraged, loved-on and bragged about has truly served to break down the wall of defense that i have built to protect my heart. this shield has served to deflect back-handed compliments and harsh-criticism and throughout time has even made it so that i can’t even hear encouragement in a positive, untainted way. being in a healthy environment has slowly begun the process of tearing down this wall and maybe more importantly putting to rest the constant fear of waiting for the other shoe to drop.
healing is happening…
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6 Responses to “journey towards healing”
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Must be nice! I’m happy for ya man!
Aaron- I have said many fine (and true) things about you, to your face and behind your back. O.K., we both know you’re stubborn as heck, but maybe you can learn to make that work for you. Seriously, I am grateful for your sense of healing and peace. I hope that you can set down the bags. There is no other shoe.
Congratulations Aaron, you’re finally getting the compliments that you deserve.
Your time in Decatur was, without any doubt, the best church experience I have had, to date. And I’m pretty sure that the Holy Spirit was not “bound” while you were there!
I love ya man, I’m glad to hear that you’re healing from your past experiences.
thanks guys, i appreciate your words of encouragement! they truly do make a difference now that the wall is crumbling down…
: )
Don’t know what “binding the holy spirit is”?
That’s because its called the HOLY GHOST! Praise Jeebus.
No really, I love Pentecostals, I really do.