Today is the day. For nearly a month now Tracy and I have been in transition, packing up our belongings and preparing to move across country and the day is finally here. This morning we’ll load the car up one last time and make our way from Carson City, Nevada around Lake Tahoe through Sacramento through Oakland and across the Bay Bridge into our new home: San Francisco.

It’s been a long drive and one that has provided a great amount of reflection of the past and a great deal of excitement and anxiety about the future… Today is the day. Today we truly begin the next chapter of our lives and today a brand new adventure becomes blatant reality. I’m not sure what it’ll be like to drive across the Bay Bridge, what emotions and feelings I’ll undergo as the city becomes visible and we descend into it but the time is here and today is the day.

Here goes nothing… and yet here goes everything.

Tracy and I have packed everything we own (and what we didn’t give away) into a tiny little pod (8′ deep, 5′ wide and 7′ tall) that is making its way across country to San Francisco at this very moment. It wasn’t as hard as I thought it might be to get rid of all of our furniture, and a tremendous amount of our possessions and it was actually very liberating and freeing! When we arrive, in early August to San Francisco, we’ll have very little to unpack and situate and hopefully a much more open and uncluttered home than in the past.

We said goodbye to many of our friends in Chicago-land over the course of the past month and hopped into the car Saturday afternoon to drive to St. Louis to spend time with family and some much needed rest and relaxation. It’s been a hectic past couple of months full of travel to San Francisco for housing and job interviews (for Tracy), trips downstate to meet with churches, and the craziness of packing and loading and wrapping up loose ends. This week will hopefully prove to be much different… restful is the key phrase.

We’ll be enjoying lazy, quiet mornings in the St. Louis countryside where my parents live and enjoy the sites and sounds of the city in the afternoons. I’m looking forward to unwinding, loosening up a bit, and preparing/restoring myself mentally, spiritually and emotionally for our next chapter in San Francisco.

The San Francisco Chronicle ran a story this past week highlighting San Francisco as the most walkable city in the United States. As I began to look through the website it links to, I noticed that not only is the city extremely walkable, but the neighborhood we’re moving into (South of Market shown above highlighted in blue) is tied for 5th in the whole city.

We arrive in the city in just a little under 3 weeks and plan to walk and utilize as much public transportation as possible! It’s a great city, and we can’t wait to get out there!

Last Sunday was my final Sunday at the Shorewood Campus and Community Christian Church. I must say that it was bittersweet, however I can’t imagine a better place to have served.

When I started at Community 14 months ago I was in a completely different place than I am now, fresh off a gut wrenching and soul draining experience—in short a hellish year of ministry (somehow even those words can’t quite sum it up). Tracy and I came to Community extremely wounded, limping in on our last legs and expecting the impossible from the people and staff of Community. We came in expecting them to restore our hope in the church, to restore our wounded psyche, our broken hearts, and help us on the road back to wholeness. What was unfair on our part—we didn’t tell them of these expectations.

What’s amazing about the staff at Community and in particular the people of the Shorewood Campus: they didn’t bat an eye, were completely unfazed and immediately surrounded us with an amazing presence of love, support and encouragement like we have never experienced before. It’s the same sort of love, support and encouragement that they give to everyone—yet for us it hit the spot and did more than we could have ever hoped or imagined.

Fourteen months later I am leaving with a renewed sense of hope and faith in the church, a firm belief that the church can actually be a healthy, vibrant, world changing force. This post doesn’t come close to giving Community its due for how it has shaped and impacted me over the past year, but I am far different and a far better person because of how this church pushed towards the mission every day. Thank you Community… I wouldn’t be heading to San Francisco if it hadn’t been for you.

This weekend we started the process of making our 7th move in 7 years of marriage. As the boxes begin piling up from cleaning out the closets, and rummaging through the majority of the possessions I’m beginning to realize that most of them haven’t seen the light of day in over a year. One thing we’re learning is how much stuff we have that we simply “have” and don’t necessarily need or use… it’s simply amazing what we hold onto and purchase for no apparent reason. So, this move is going to be a little bit different… we’re starting over and giving the majority of our stuff away and selling nothing. We’ve already found a home for a few of our things with Habitat for Humanity and hopefully the rest will find good homes fairly soon. We’ve made several trips to Goodwill and haven’t really thrown much away at all… hopefully one man’s un-necessities can be another families treasure.

An excerpt from my journal…

Nearly 2 months have gone by since journaling or really paying much attention to Scripture… and 2 months later I can certainly feel myself out of joint, out of rhythm, and out of sync. I’m amazed at how this discipline and this time truly helps me to slow down my thoughts, focus on the day and the tasks ahead and settle into the rhythms that God has created in me.

Journaling isn’t just for my relationship with God, but it’s also for my own sanity…

I’ve always enjoyed journaling, always found it rewarding and exciting to fill up page after page with my thoughts and reflections… but that might just be because I really do like to write more than anything. It wasn’t until a few days ago that I was able to finally put my finger on exactly what the benefit of journaling is for my life… and why it’s such an important discipline for me to undertake. This is one of those journal entries that I will undoubtedly come back to time and time again, and more than likely repeat in some form throughout the next several months as this discipline truly takes root in my heart, mind and soul.

My journal has a lot of pages dripping with anger, angst, emotion and remembrance. I really enjoy going back through it and seeing just how much God has done throughout my life, especially in just short amounts of time. I think this discipline is a keeper.

Finding the time to slow down is often times one of the hardest things to do. When met with deadlines, and large projects, the weight and stress of doing something bigger than you can even fathom, speed seems to be of the essence. This makes patience very, very hard to come by, and very, very hard to live in. Attempting to slow down is never as simple as stepping away for in the attempt you are met with nothing but the thoughts of busy-ness, the next to-do list, the next task that must be accomplished or the next and latest greatest idea that is in your mind. Slowing down is hard to do.

I’ve been fairly good throughout the past year, of taking one day a week off and using it for rest or fun but I’ve never been good at using that day to truly slow down, re-center myself and “de-tox” from the weeks activity. In this recognition, I am striving to learn what slowing down looks like… what slowing down is… and hopefully experience and learn just how good it is not only for my frame of mind, but for my soul.

This past weekend after 3 years of study, I finally walked across the stage and received my Master of Arts in Contemporary Theology from Lincoln Christian Seminary. It was sort of a strange celebration considering I finished everything long before this ceremony took place, but it was fun to have my parents and Tracy’s parents come up from down south to celebrate with us.

One of the more laughable moments came as I walked across the stage to have my servants towel placed over my right arm. As my future plans about planting a church in San Francisco were read off, the associate dean who “toweled” me began to chuckle, looked me in the eyes and said, “Wow, you’re crazy!” To which I responded “thanks.” As I walked down the steps and back to my seat I began to think about all the other graduates and where they were heading. Many returning back to ministries they have been a part of for years, others looking for ministry teams to join in on, but then a select group were heading off to Afghanistan with the military as chaplains, or to Uganda or Indonesia as missionaries and it struck me—I’m crazy?! What about the danger that many of my fellow classmates are putting themselves and their families into? I’m simply heading off to San Francisco within the confines of the continental United States, they’re heading to distant lands and distant shores in far different contexts than I will ever experience.

This theme seems to be a pretty common occurrence when people find out that Tracy and I are going to SF. We get a particular look, then almost a conciliatory “good luck with that” response. I’m still confused and dumbfounded by that look and response… maybe I’m naive to the intricate culture of SF, and if this is the case I hope to remain in my naivete long enough to make a difference. However, maybe SF has been viewed as one of the last greatest conclaves of iniquity in our country by those in the Midwest and conservative America. Could this be the reason for their response, their reaction? I’m not sure, but it is interesting to me and somewhat encouraging to know that of all the students in the Seminary, I’m the crazy one.

6 years ago this month, Tracy and I made our way to Seattle to celebrate our honeymoon. We spent our first few days as newlyweds in the Mt. Rainier National Park in a secluded cabin in the middle of no-where. It was a dark, quiet, and beautiful place to stay… yet because of the quiet and the dark I slept horribly… Tracy on the other hand slept like an angel. Our next few days were spent in the city of Seattle taking in the sites, enjoying the Space Needle, Pike Street Market and the culture of the city.

This past week I was able to return to the Seattle area for a few days for a training session for church planters, and the final day of the trip I was able to make it into the city and to the Pike Street Market… unfortunately this time Tracy wasn’t with me. It was a great place to visit, but a hard place to be without my lovely wife… especially considering the memories we had.

I did, however, thoroughly enjoy the Pike Street Market again with all its charm, uniqueness and the eclectic nature of it all. I enjoyed the street musicians, the flying fish, and the unique novelties that people sold throughout. I was even able to visit the first ever Starbucks again (first time was with Tracy). I love Seattle, the culture, the people, the conversations that you can so easily strike up with people. It’s a great place. Hopefully in the coming years Tracy and I can both go back together… and maybe the next time I’ll get to see Mt. Rainier!*

*In the two trips that I’ve made to Seattle, I’ve never, ever seen this 15,000 ft. mountain that everyone talks about and is extremely visible from the city… that is of course when there is no rain… or clouds in the sky!

my first bicycle crash was not a pretty one, nor was it particularly spectacular…but it certainly hurt and left me with a mild concussion.

riding home from caribou coffee after a good long session of message writing for our upcoming marriage retreat at the shorewood campus, i was on the road taking a left in a turn lane when i decided to hop the curb (a typical move) to get on the bike path… only i didn’t quite clear the curb—it was a lot higher than i anticipated. i was traveling at a pretty good clip and i flipped over my handlebars and landed square on my head. thank goodness for helmets!

i have a massive headache, watery eyes, and woke up this morning in a fog… it’s good times and tylenol isn’t taking it away… so, what am i going to do? get back on my bike this morning and head off to caribou once again… this time the curb won’t win!

a couple of days ago in my frustration i wrote a post entitled the downfalls of a one car family, and although it’s true that only having one car does set you up for potential disaster, there are so many more benefits that outweigh the negatives… so, in an attempt to redeem myself… here they are in no particular order:

• you save money… lots of money! no longer do we have two car payments, no longer do we have to fill up two cars with gas, no longer do we have to do two oil changes, no longer do we have two insurance payments… the list could go on and on as we have successfully reduced our automotive expenditures in half. not only that, but by downsizing to a hybrid, our gasoline costs have drastically decreased. instead of filling up two cars one to one and a half times a week, we are now filling up one car about one time every week and a half… and this is with tracy commuting about 45 minutes away. with gas prices expected to exceed $4/gallon this summer, we won’t feel the pinch nearly as bad as most will.
• its good for the environment! now that global warming is proving to be a sham [ht: bob hyatt] this may not seem as important as it used to, however it’s still a good idea to be good stewards of the resources that God has given… so, we’re being green and cutting down on pollution… drastically. in fact, our carbon footprint has been significantly reduced (we’re currently at 11.192 tonnes—down from 23.088—20.4 tonnes is the national average)!
• it forces better coordination of your schedule this is an important one for my sake. instead of constantly forgetting to tell tracy what’s going on, or constantly accepting invitations blindly, etc, etc, etc… i now have to make sure we don’t have any transportation issues which creates a better sense of communication in the home… always a good thing! along these same lines it has forced me to get up earlier in the morning… this has actually been a really nice change in my routine—sleeping in is 7:00. (i never thought i’d say that in my entire life!)

There are others… but I won’t bore you with the details. So, to sum it up… being a one car family in the suburbs of Chicago isn’t the easiest thing in the world, but I rather enjoy it and wouldn’t give it up… even though it is a hassle from time to time.

tracy and i embarked on a new journey almost a year ago—the life of a one car family.  for the most part it has been relatively pain free, a few hitches here and there as we try and coordinate schedules to get everywhere that we need to get to but for the most part those hitches have been weather related.  (it’s hard to ride my bike—bicycle—the 5 miles into the office when there’s snow everywhere.)  we’ve figured out a fairly beautiful system that will run perfectly when the snow is gone and spring arrives—it has been really interesting riding a bike in 12 degree weather with wind chills in the negative.

yesterday, however we hit a major snag… tracy was in an accident.  she got hit in the side by a driver unaware she was there… (probably talking on a cell phone).  the lady admitted she didn’t see tracy and didn’t stop until after she hit her—no brakes.  tracy, thankfully is okay, but our poor, poor little prius is not so hot at the moment.  it’s running a but funkily and as a result we have become a no car family in one brief instant.

dealing with insurance companies is never any fun, but it’s especially no fun when you can’t reach an adjuster from a different insurance company so that you can get a rental car on their dime.  (and honestly, i’m not looking forward to a rental car that will last longer than a week—going from 50 mpg to 20 mpg is not going to be so kind on the budget.)  so, with no backup we sit… waiting…

the one bright spot for this whole thing is that this time—tracy got hit before in a gas station parking lot while pumping gas by a drunk driver—this time the lady that hit her has insurance!  last time this was not the case.